sreda, 02. maj 2018

My first love. Awwwh.

First of all, I am sorry I have been MIA for a little while, the truth is I haven't been really mentally and physically okay with my disease. I tried to write, really, but I have been disappointed in our health system and how my life turned out to be because of it. But now I am out and about all this and ready to go back to writing.

And yes, that is me without make up just to make it up to you. K continue with reading this.
Now that we are friends again, I have something to tell you. I have been away for quite some time and in this time, I had a lot of ideas what to say and how to say it. Sometimes I feel like I have the right ideas but I just don't know how to say it the right way. Sometimes when I write stories people take them very personally and sometimes they take them the wrong way, but I am just a girl with a simple blog and not so simple life. 

But let me tell you about my first love. It scared me and made me go super crazy. Even now when I am relatively grown up it still makes me crazy. I caught myself thinking of it multiple times and fun fact - it happened 8 years ago. One boy, 8 years ago and I still think about it till this very day. I see him approximately one time per year or hear from him, you know just in case, to not forget we exist he reminds me of his existence. That is the thing of first love I guess - I will always hate him and always care. And it will drive me crazy from time to time. But despite of that I am excited to see what the future holds for me. Sometimes, as crazy at it sounds, I just want to be friends and sort out every beef I ever had with anyone. Almost anyone.

But if you are reading this, just in case if you are, I have a great story to tell you and maybe you should give me a call when the time will come. Better not call me because I might not answer because that would just freak me out. But surely text me and we can go grab a cup of coffee. And I always wanted to punch your face, so maybe let me do that just for you know, for my own satisfaction because I had been angry for so long. I am kidding kinda, but not really.

Life changed for me so drastically and so quickly. One day I was carefree and I was doing crazy stupid things with my friends and then almost overnight I had to grow up. I had to give up my life and I had all this changes happen to me and I got so scared that I didn't want to deal with anybody and at some point I wanted to kill certain people (not literally) but at the same time I wanted them back. 

Whenever I have any crazy ideas, about how I will call them or anything, I just start playing CoD and that's why I am almost already Prestige 3 and I am a killer with knowing weapons, like you name them, I will kill you with LMG's/SMG's/Rifle's. Yes I am the proud owner of my own Volkssturmgewehr Defiance Rifle and I can kill you with my eyes closed, not to be bragging or anything hah. But I suck with Shotguns. Like those things make me so angry whenever anyone dares to blow me up with one of those (yes, poor choice of words, but I have to make this at least a bit sexy). And I can pistol some bitches as well, if they are particularly bad, but I can. I don't like to, but if I have to, I will kill you with a freaking shovel or a ?hoe?... is it called hoe tho? I hope not, because it sounds weird to say that I can kill a person with a hoe. I will end this blog post with giving you a great image of me killing people with hoes! 

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