petek, 16. november 2018


petek, 16. november 2018


I've been planning and dreaming to get another dog since 2012 and it always felt kind of impossible for me, because I am a perfectionist. Me owning another dog would just have to be perfect, I was not settling for something half done. My list was long and I was determined. Money, time, space, moving on my own, some more money, lifestyle that would allow my dogs to go with me literally everywhere... And when I finally moved out, it was time. I was ready and after a really exhausting summer full of betrayal and tears, I met Lina and her family. I saw Orca. Honestly, I didn't plan Orca, she came to my life. It was a match made in heaven.

Everyone falls in love with Orca, from the first second they meet her. She is the most loveable dog you will ever see. With other words, she is a cuddle machine. She will throw herself, carelessly, to your hug. I haven't seen anything quite like it. She sleeps on my neck and smiles a lot. Sometimes when it is night and dogs are already sleeping in their crate, I flash them with my phone light to check if they are okay, and I see Orca creepy smiling at me back and it freaks me a little, because honestly she looks spooky, but also it warms my heart. She is just so happy all the time and won't let you be upset and that is just the best feature your dog can have. When we walk on the street, everyone stops to cuddle her and people always say that she is so precious and it makes me really proud. She doesn't have a single bad day or bad situation (except when I have to chase her with a ball, because she won't come inside).

Nothing matches her beauty. We could literally be standing by the most beautiful place of the whole seaside and watch the sunset and she would still attract more wow's than the view. Yes, she is a small bean, but she will grow and even if she stays this small, she is perfect already. I just love everything about her. She made me fall madly for her dark nose and white markings. Obviously everyone will say that their dog is the prettiest, but still.

She is quirky. There is no way she won't make you laugh. She makes this weird look when it looks like she ate her upper lip and she will just look at you with this funny face and I dare you to not laugh. She also just is clumsy as hell. That is something we have in common. But she once fell down a SINGLE stair and cried for 5 minutes. I thought that she hurt herself, but she was okay. And also when she is around Thor she just forgets about everything. And falls like she never learned to use legs. And she is the slowest eater in the whole planet. I gave her a single chicken leg to eat and I swear on my life that she was eating it for solid 80 minutes and she was still not done. You just have to laugh. The difference between Thor and Orca is that When I give Thor a bite of a sausage he eats in in less than 0.001 second and when I give Orca a bite she first licks it for around 5 minutes and then decides to eat it and eats it in 10 minutes. A single bite.

When I got her I immediately felt a strong connection between us. She was a really strenuous puppy. For the first two weeks she would NOT sleep at night and that meant I didn't sleep at night. Nobody slept in the night. And I would sing to her, cradle her and then I finally found a solution. I played her a song from Tom Odell (Somehow). I legit want to marry Tom's voice. Please play this song at my wedding. We have the same taste in music. She literally falls asleep every time I play that for her. It is a great song, it calms me down as well. I caught myself several times falling asleep on the floor right next to her listening to this song. She complicates when she needs to and I can't blame her, because I complicate a lot too. For me everything has to be perfect and I could be a professional planner, because I plan everything and if its not like I planned I complicate. Orca is exactly the same. If I were a dog I would be Orca. We both require a lot of cuddles and belly rubs. Both will purr and we need people to give us their full attention. I will also do anything for that piece of meat HAHA okay ignore this. I couldn't resist. The thing is we both stand out from the crowd.

Get you someone who will look at you the same way as Orca looks at me. She is utterly and completely loyal and there is no way you can convince her to leave my site. Ask anybody.

She is super clean. This one goes out to my boy Thor, who is a dog-pig and everything he touches is just dirty and disgusting. Orca is the opposite. She is the cleanest puppy you will meet. There was once one rice stuck on her paw and she would only walk with her three legs, holding the one with the rice up the air. I mean, she is crazy haha. You gotta love her. It is kinda hard to find a picture where she wouldn't smile. The greatest thing of owning a my Toller is just her will to work with me. She is smarter than most people. No offence. But I show her trick two or three times and she knows how to do it and practices it herself. I've been around plenty of Border Collies and man, I can say that she might be smarter. This whole time I just feel like I am criticising everybody. Just my observation.

Oh man, every flaw I can think about reminds me of myself and then I remember that that flaws actually make her the best possible puppy. I am just going to say this: I love her forever. No matter what happens. No matter how hard it will get or how simple. We are forever bonded and I will do everything in my power to make sure you have the best possible life and nothing bad ever happens to you. You are the best thing in my life. I don't know how to behave without you. I'd die if you go away.

No words in the world to describe how lucky I am that you had such a great family before you came into my life. It means everything. It is everything.
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četrtek, 15. november 2018

If I don't have you, at least I still have me

četrtek, 15. november 2018

If I don't have you, at least I still have me

This picture represents so many things, but for the sake of today's philosophy let's pretend that I was discussing something not so sexual. Let's pretend, hue. 

When I was really smol, I never imagined how I will have a boyfriend or be in love. When I realised I will have kids one day I just thought I will get them as a gift from someone (man, it sounds weird now). The thing is my mates always talked about boys and how they like them and love them and how nothing is more important than them. And when they asked me who I love I always just picked one random person in the room and said... "yes, that one, I love him so very much". But in reality I never loved them or even cared to put up with them. We can say that I did this so I would fit in with my friends. And the problem was that I never stopped doing that. I stopped caring about being cool and stuff, but I never just stopped picking random people that I don't really love and make them like me. 

And when I look back at how many people I actually dated and 'liked' aka had flings it makes me giggle. Not in a cute funny way. In a really weirded out what am I doing with my life kind of way. But at the age of 22 AND A HALF I can say that I really really really liked/loved exactly two people. But when one of those two broke my heart, yes broke... It was horrible for so long. Like for probably most of you, when you deal with heartbreaks. And I always write so much when I am unhappy. Fun fact: you can actually know when I was unhappy looking back at my blog content. The best-worst part of having your heart broken is the quick realisation that comes soon after.

Realising that no matter how I alone I feel, I will always have ME. That I don't need anyone to do something, to achieve something, to feel something or to be happy. And that is important to know. Even Eva, who always needed someone, doesn't actually need anyone. Cool. So... why am I dating somebody then? Because if I am perfectly good by myself, doesn't mean that I am not having a perfectly good time with someone else. 

People always mistakenly think that when we are alone, we are not reaching our full potential, but I always reached mine when I was completely and utterly alone. I read somewhere: "The more you know who you are, and what you want, the less you let things upset you." and sometimes I swear to god I feel like somebody wrote that line just for me. It is not about love and relationship and your boyfriend, it is about us and as soon as you silly brokenhearted people get it the better. 

There are so many different paths out there for us to take, so if you get lost in one, just take another. Metaphorically obviously... don't blame me when you take my rambles literally and actually get lost.
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sreda, 14. november 2018

The advice/criticism I received from my ex boyfriends/friends

sreda, 14. november 2018

The advice/criticism I received from my ex boyfriends/friends

Don't think too much into it and don't make this a game of guessing names. I just thought of this as a really fun and entertaining content while I go down the memory lane. 

1. "You should always think of yourself first. School should be more important to you than anything else."

2. "You're not really sad, you are just bored."

3. "Maybe if you wouldn't be so complicated you could see how simple this really is."

4. "The problem is that you are just the kind of girl that will go on loving somebody else, but really you should be here fixing the mess you've made."

5. "Stop thinking so much of the past."

6. "Can you please just start listening to happier songs and stop obsessing over fandoms. We all know you are not going to marry a 56-year-old who is already married to someone else."

7. "You shouldn't pout so much, it is not a good look for you."

8. "One tortoise is enough, we don't need so many."

9. "Stop using the heather so much, it is hot already." (every boyfriend ever)

10. "You're annoying when you are irritated and when you ignore me."

11. "Stop being a sore looser."

12. "I don't think dogs are for you. You can't own a dog if you are sick and be good at it."

13. "Stop fucking biting your nails, disgusting!"

14. "If I am going to watch that movie (eva's favourite) one more time, I will go psycho. You better not test me hehe."

15. "You should listen to your mother more."

16. "You can't have two favourite numbers - 3 & 7."

17. "You don't listen to rap if you only listen to three basic rappers."

18. "One Direction infection is not a real thing."

19. "I think it would be better if you would stop telling people your dog is your baby, because they always take it the wrong way."

20. "I totally see you as a police-woman one day. Everything can't be fair in life."

21. "Stop hating on your name, its nice."

22. "Let's run away together when we will be 18 and never come back, it is going to be so much better." (still holding onto that)

23. "If you feel like you need to do something just do it. If you have to tell somebody something do it asap."

24. "Your heart is not really broken right now, you will find someone better and then you can go on telling people your heart got broken. But this is definitely not it."

25. "Give your dad another chance."

26. "You won't be happy until your house is full of animals, is that actually what you're saying right now!? *pause* Okay, I agree. You won't be happy until your house is full of animals. You just need someone richer than me that has a house already."

27. "Stop talking in that annoying deep voice when you are pissed."

28. "You would make a great relationship therapist."

29. "If you name your future kid Summer everyone will hate it."

30. "Stop blogging about me!" (huehuehue)

I clearly do what I want.
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