ponedeljek, 14. oktober 2019

How do I say goodbye?!

The sole fact that I've always been living feeling kinda guilty because I always though that I just wasn't doing enough and wasn't living by my full potential might not come as a surprise. As much as I appear to be the kind of person that doesn't care and stress about how others see me, I have spend hours and days and weeks doubting myself. I've been giving up on this blog slowly but surely for a whole year now. It is not what it has been and it makes me sad. The real reason is I kept this thought in my head that maybe my words aren't worth reading and I was debating if I should write at all or just give up. But how do I say goodbye to this?! I can't. Parting with this platform that has been there for me for so long and helped me to understand so much and gave me opportunity to do things I am doing right now; I just don't see myself doing that any time soon. But it is not fair to those, who have been there for this little world of mine and still are. You see, I am full of guilt.

But guilt aside, I've just been too busy. In the last couple of weeks I've been struggling to live. I guess in a good sense, but it is debatable. Being everywhere and doing everything, never saying no, is what I do all my life. Sometimes I think I am doing too much for my own good and then there are weeks, when I don't do anything remotely productive. There is nothing in between. From one extreme to another. I fill discs with photos so fast these days. My weeks are filled and my anxiety of meeting new people is almost not existent at this point, because I've been busy. I guess hard work pays off. I like to think I can make it in this world, if I only work hard, even if I don't currently have it all. And my photography has definitely skyrocketed.

But this is my comeback. I want to be active here, even if I only post like a bunch of photos with no real content. Just know that maybe my days are filled with me taking up to 2000 photos a day with Thor and Orca by my side, eating something I can grab really fast and sleeping for 4 hours and then drinking my 3 coffee cups in the morning and drive and repeat. My life changed drastically you could say, but my priorities changed and I love my life now and I love where this is going. I have so many plans it is hard for me to comprehend. But still if you want to hang out or collaborate, write me. I am always down. 😉

I'd like to officially welcome myself back, thanks for having me again.

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